[[ 91 ]] Coming Out

When Marie and I came out to my parents about our polyamorous relationship with Rika, they reacted horribly. Granted, it was completely new to them. But it was completely new to us as well - and having never faced such a situation before, the interaction was rife with flaws and confusion on all sides.
I wish I could take it back.

But I can't.

Just as I can't take back things that I did in the 5th grade. Or how my parents can't 'replace' the fact that I grew up in a household that didn't show affection. See....that's the thing about Life: there aren't do-overs. You have to figure it out as you go. In most cases, people are just doing the best they can to make it, even if they're stumbling.
This is never more true than when applied to parents and kids; it isn't always reasonable to think that your family is doing things to you - when more likely, they're doing things because of themselves.
So you should expect mistakes and missteps. You make them?  Others do too.

Attachment conflicts give us the opportunity to consider complex relationship issues and grow. 
When we can't, the results are painful. They should be.

Sadly, my folks couldn't make the leap. They just couldn't find a reason to grow.
We don't speak anymore... 

But we did. Marie, Rika and I.
Over the past six years, we have become much better at knowing how to come out in a way that is more compassionate, understanding and patient with others. Our intent is not to 'convert' them, but to reveal ourselves.

Carefully, yes. But honestly - because no one should have to hide the truth about Love.

- C.D.

*For more from the insightful TheraminTrees - please click here.

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What is the truth about Love, you ask? Ah.  Well, to me - it's this: 

Everything you've ever had, everyone you've ever cared about -- none of it was ever really yours. 

It was just being shared with you all along. 

Time and Circumstance gave it to you. Time and Circumstance will take it away, too. Better off learning to attract, rather than defend what you want. Better off looking to give love, not secure it. 

If that makes you feel threatened and tighten your fists, you will have less in life.

But if you are gracious and smart about it, you can have More. You can give More too. 

--- and that's the real point: 

If we all just gave a little More... there would be enough for everyone.  

[[ 90 ]] To Parents

... when this is the message that your kid is presenting,
           - -  -should you listen, or continue to tell them 'how it is'?

From several different angles, that same thought -












...and to my religious family -

The Paradoxical Commandments

by Dr. Kent M. Keith

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
   Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
   Do good anyway.
3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
   Succeed anyway.
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
   Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
   Be honest and frank anyway.
6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
   Think big anyway.
7. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
   Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
   Build anyway.
9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
   Help people anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
    Give the world the best you have anyway.

© 1968, 2001 Kent M. Keith

"The Paradoxical Commandments" were written by Kent M. Keith in 1968 as part of a booklet for student leaders.

[[ 89 ]] Dear Fat People

Dear Fat People-

Today, I absorbed 0 calories from the meals you ate. 
However, I'm still going to force my diet on you. Please understand how much you need this. 

If you don't let me choose your meals, let's be clear - you are persecuting me! I have a divine right to choose what you eat! I have a book which tells me that I have the right to do so. Do you? No.

Meanwhile, pay no mind to the candy bars in my back pocket. You're trying to change the subject. Your kind always tries to twist the facts to suit their argument. That's how being fat works. You're focused on my candy bar because all you think about is how you can justify your lifestyle.
Besides, I'm only human.. I'm allowed to cheat on my diet every now and then. Just as long as I humbly acknowledge that I was hungry, and that NOW...  I'm sincerely sorry about all the chocolate around my mouth; I will still lose the weight. This is promised to me.
Can you say the same? What diet do you believe in?  None.
Then you need to accept that YOUR sinful desires are at the heart of the problem!

Look -- I love you and I'm just trying to do what is best for you: shaming and disowning you may be effective, but because I really care about your health, I'm going to do my best to make sure you don't have legal access to fattening snacks. Yes - like candy bars.  Go on -- I see your little smirk there...you can keep trying to act all smug and logical, but I have GOOD reasons for my mistakes! 

See... delicious treats like that should only be eaten by people like myself. People who respect the sanctity of snacking and only do so responsibly. So what if this is my third Snickers today? I know what I'm doing. I just need to ... shed a few pounds.. maybe get some plastic surgery or a tummy tuck and I'll be fine. Besides, we were all born fat, y'know?  This is inherent to ALL men, regardless of how many vegetables they'll eat later in life, or how hard they exercise! We are all BORN guilty of loving sweets and tasty things. 

But ....lest you be tempted, know that my book has declared that all appetites for snacks are unnatural!  
Do not be fooled by your naturally unnatural nature! It is AGAINST the very wishes of the infinitely-wise being who designed us this way! We did this to ourselves; when the first woman -- ignorant of any nutritional labeling, looked at an eclair and an apple hanging from a tree, and made the wrong choice. 

Yea I shall RENOUNCE her sins and yours - even as I forgive my own!     
REPENT and abandon all things impure!  Additives are falsehoods! 
They are mixed in with Seasoned and Packaged Lies, to sweeten the bitter truth! 

*Just like Christmas: a time when Christians celebrate their Pagan roots. 
     - Charles   http://realtruth.org/articles/169-ttooc.html

So.. you need to stop, right now. Get down on your knees and open your mouth to what I want to stuff in it! You need to be pious like me, and stop with all this NEW AGE nonsense and weird lifestyle choices! I don't know what 'quinoa' is - but it sounds like some sort of damned cult! Clearly - you're not happy being you!  That's why you do these things and don't accept your true nature! 
That's why you HATE healthiness!! 
You say you don't, but I can see a dark shadow hovering over you - and... it's really pretty wide.

I'm not judging you, but you should be ashamed! Think about how your choices make everyone else feel. What about your grandparents? What about your little niece? Or me? Think of how much I'm going to miss you when I'm in Thin People Heaven, and you're burning eternally in a lake of cherry pie filling and Cool Ranch Doritos...

So CHANGE YOUR WAYS! Until then, understand that we have to protect our schools and OUR way of life! If you want to be tubby, keep it to yourself. You guys have places where you can go, right? Where you all meet up and have your... orgies or banquets or whatever? So the rest of us shouldn't have to deal with seeing your kind everywhere... eating and kissing and holding hands like 'normal' people. It's gross!  
It's bad for our young people to be exposed to that. Bad for our future. And bad for America. 

Yes.... Our founding fathers believed in FREEDOM ...
   --- but, not for you gays lefties blackies jews irish vegans women hippies fatties meek.

Get right with Righteousness.   
*Or at the very least.... get yourself on a diet like mine, 
       -- so you can eat anything you want, then be angry with other people for making you feel fat. 

With great love and abhorrence,

- Thin Theists Everywhere

photo source: Post Secret Facebook page

Honestly...



- C.D.


* In case you missed the true angle of my parody: DON'T PANIC

** Yeah... I know the article is too long, but dang if I haven't heard every one of these wholly ignorant comments before, ad nauseam!! So venting a little was fun and therapeutic - please forgive my indulgence...  ^  ^

***  I'm not gay, but I am in an awesome, egalitarian and highly-functional interracial poly relationship (5+ years!); so I can relate to how OFFENSIVE it is to be told that your love is not valid. We've been the recipients of some amazingly shitty comments from people who are unhappy with life in general, and those who have remarried or otherwise made a mess out of their own faiths, families and romantic lives. Often, as they pursued their own fulfillment in the ways they thought were rational, just like everyone else...

So here's some advice to anyone who fears responsible adult happiness:

--- Those who *can* walk on tightropes, should.   Only them. 
I'd never recommend anything risky to anyone who can't deal with it. Equally, I'd never hold back those who could. As long as no one was being harmed and all involved were consensual, I'd just observe, perhaps finding fascination in a lifestyle which differed so much from my own. 

If you want to talk and discuss how a thing works - do so!  If you want to understand why such choices may not be right for you, I highly encourage that any sentient being be able to consider ALL options in life. Again, let's communicate! But at the end of the day... if you Just Can't Handle someone else's joy -----   please STFU and enjoy the show.

All this misapplied angst as you demonize others while doing nothing to build bridges? 
Utter bullocks!

Every man, woman and child you know is undergoing a continual process of construction and evolution. Genuinely trying, failing and trying again - in hopes of a more sustainable and meaningful happiness. Everybody here has chocolate all over their hands and a messy face! This, because we are compelled to adore sweetness while still hoping to mitigate the weight gain and agony in any consequences. However our stories may differ, our struggles and failures will forever be so commonly related. 
You too. 
Figure that out and contribute positively to the greater narrative. 

Your 'condemnation'? So poorly rationalized and created in your own image?
Listen - the first person who needed your good judgment and insight was you.

How'd that work out?

[[ 88 ]] Last Words Before Being Killed

LAST WORDS

Their final words before being killed by police.

" Without equal access to the law, the system not only robs the poor of their only protection, but it places it in the hands of their oppressors the most powerful and ruthless weapon ever created ." 
- Reginald Heber Smith, Justice and the Poor, 1919

" Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them, and these will continue until they are resisted with either words or blows, or with both. "
- Frederick Douglass, "West Indian Emancipation" August 4, 1857




And of course, not all police are bad. Most officers are actually quite effective, polite and reliable. But just as it is with 'bad people', bad cops exists. That's reality, not demonization.

The point? 
I have peaceful, reasonable methods of discourse and resistance if confronted by bad people. However, I have no recourse but complete dog-like obedience & fucking hope when dealing with bad cops.
-C.D.

[[ 87 ]] Physics

I see it this way...

ABUNDANCE = CHOICE = INDEPENDENCE = FREEDOM

SCARCITY = CONSTRAINT = DEPENDENCY = CONTROL

Some people express a need to explore and challenge the boundaries of life. Those who want you to have more choices as well, can speak clearly of it – including its limitations and any potential consequences. They are compelled to ask that you act responsibly with your privileges.

They understand that there will not always be agreement, but can accept your non-confrontational acts as mere variation of options– without the need to demonize or feel threatened.

Some people express a need to focus and enforce the boundaries of life. Those who want you to have fewer choices as well, tend to obfuscate that fact by any means possible - promising rewards later for your surrender, obedience and conformity now. They are compelled to ask that you obtain your privileges through acts they deem responsible.

When they do not agree with your choices, even your non-confrontational acts are demonized, because they see any real variation of options as a threat.

To express a fear of other people having more choice is to assume that given the opportunity- everyone is a monster. 

Really? How terrifying then, the world you live in and project!

How unsatisfying and pitiful your suffering has left you, even in the midst of all this amazing kindness.

- C.D.

[[ 86 ]] DON'T PANIC. (LOVE IS A HUMAN EXPERIENCE...)

[[ 86 ]] LOVE IS A HUMAN EXPERIENCE...
                 --- not a religious right or a political statement.

Marriage Equality will return it to that basic state.

It wasn't social fodder because gays had an 'agenda' - it became that because Group-A wanted to deny Group-B equal privilege, and Group-C wanted to use the angst this created as an opportunity to manipulate votes.
So Group-B had to defend themselves. That's all.

In 1967 the Supreme Court legalized interracial marriage in the United States.
It's been 48 years since then, and in most places - people just don't make a big fuss anymore when they see a mixed race couple.

So... it's not unreasonable to think that
      -- in less than a generation.... gay marriage is likely to fade from social relevance.

Worry not. Some other challenge will rise to take its place: religions need people to demonize and politicians prey on causes. Perhaps the Next Big Controversy will be the legalization of marijuana? Maybe the nation's commitment to clean energy and self-driving cars? Or perhaps, the right for poly families to legally recognize their marriages too?
Whatever it is, the same players will take the same sides.
There will be setbacks and great strife, followed by progress and growth.

Don't Panic. This is the story of Humanity. 

- C.D.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Please enjoy this smart and moving video, beautifully expressing the legalization of fair treatment.

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Now.... as for this - -

Oh?  Fine.  GAME ON. 

If that's what you're really fighting for, dudes - please let me know so the misogynist in me can consider joining your ranks!

- C.D.

*And by 'let me know', I mean don't call me.

MEANWHILE, SOMEWHERE IN THE WORLD -- - 

Other people are guilty of loving each other in new and unexpected ways...

oh. the horror. 

[[ 85 ]] DRUGS, SEX AND ORGIES EVERY THURSDAY NIGHT.

*Mmmyeahh... no.  This isn't what it's like.  


I don't think it's any mystery that single people and monogamous couples have a lot of misperceptions about people like myself, who choose to be in 'poly' relationships.  And why not?  The media spins polyamory to look like an irresponsible buffet of sexual delights. The religious right demonizes it... even though it was fine in the Bible. And among poly-folk, relationships come in a variety of sizes and configurations.
Honestly, there's plenty to NOT understand....

Marie, Rika and I prefer a policy of polyfidelity; we are exclusive to one another. However, even though our relationship shares some relevant aspects with monogamy, the speculations about us are no less outrageous. And often.... pretty lame.

Sorry to disappoint those seeking drama and scandal, but frankly -- -we're pretty standard. We live in suburbia, have white-collar jobs and are about as far as you can get from 'hedonistic, drug-smoking, yoga-Vegan, free-love hippies'.
Although.... we do sorta' like those people! Heh.

So Rika decided she wanted to respond to some of the most frequently assed asked questions about poly relationships. And by 'frequently' she means almost never? Not to our faces, anyhow.
There's a lot of really stupid speculations that people will make behind our backs...  but to tell the truth - we get it. 

We wouldn't walk up to you and ask how many times a week you have sex either. 

So no worries...  we ain't mad at ya.

But -- true to the poly way, we believe that most ignorance and fear can be dispelled with good communication!  That, and a strong dose of common sense.

Please visit Rika's page to hear her thoughts on some of the questions that are too hot to handle and possibly NSFW. She just began a series on the topic, leading with an article delightfully titled ---

Why Poly? Couldn't you find your OWN man?

Hoo-boy...

 - C.D.

*** Also visit KimchiCuddles, who creates very cute and insightful comics which beautifully illustrate the joy, challenges and wonders of this thing called LOVE!  kimchicuddles.com



What it really IS like...   =)

[[ 84 ]] DISHONEST (God made you do it?)

Are we looking for a solution – or just seeking a verdict?  Are we sharing facts and perspectives, looking for a reasonable middle ground – or simply declaring how much we like to judge one another?

If you shut yourself off to the possibilities of other perspectives, you lose touch with the mainstream view. What you perceive to be ‘normal’ or rational or even real – drifts from center.

By definition, extreme positions lack awareness of how extreme they've become.

They tend to seal themselves away from others - refusing to have any meaningful discussion with those they disagree with.

Yet we Atheists often hear Christians say " I know all I need to know." as they declare others to be unreasonable and unapproachable. 

It's one thing to avoid people who are clearly adversarial, but .. is that always the case?

If you choose Red and I choose Blue, does that mean that our lives and beings conflict in every other way?   

No. Acting like that's the only conclusion is dishonest.

The truth is that you, like anyone else -- are the result of a complex series of experiences and events, all perceived through your unique personality. You didn't start off your life as you are now, nor were you conscious of your every choice and action. And along the way, you made some huge mistakes... some of which still affect you to this day.  

Some of which you only realized later in life.

If you would want God, or anyone - to understand and consider that when judging you... wouldn't it only be right to extend those same understandings to everyone you meet?  

When you cannot, and your faith allows you to designate the harshest of attitudes toward other people over a singular issue, you are being dogmatic.  

This is zealotry.  That's not name-calling; it's merely a description of an attitude. 

Zealotry is an approach which, by inclination –  regulates other people as 'pawns', then constructs the entire relationship based upon either indoctrinating or alienating them. That sounds harsh, but when you exhibit behavior which indicates 'you're either with me or you're against me', that's exactly what's being enacted! By removing the possibility of a third option, exiling others bars honest examination of their conditions.

The moment you take such a position, you’ve initiated a dishonest act. 

Even if you are right, even if you're certain you're justified -- it is possible that your method of consideration could be wrong.

What is your agenda?

- to help others understand your faith?

- to make others understand your faith?

- to allow others to understand your faith?

These angles are very different, and the truth is often revealed in how you react when others don't comply with your intentions!

                             

You can only detect the truth of your actions by first committing to honest self-examination.The best examination is that which allows for reasonable discourse, discussion and change.  In order to do that, try to positively engage those whom you feel are least like you. It really does matter!

If you were right, you’ve lost nothing.  

If you were wrong, you may change everything.

But at the very least, you would have taken the honest opportunity to fulfill your divine instruction and represent the word of God. 

Ask yourself: 

Am I ok with the way I've behaved?

Have I been fair? 

Might I have done things differently if given a chance? 

Shutting others out and justifying it? 

It's dishonest to your divine mission, your God and really..  yourself. Never let anyone preach to you that ignorance is a virtue. It's not -- it's a liability. 

Only when we posses good information about the world can we hope to respond with any real justice and precision. 

And precision matters. 

It is the difference between unleaded and diesel gasoline.

Or - a well-examined truth vs. a self-justifying assumption. 

Happy Easter.

-C.D.

[[ 83 ]] Love is Inclusion

WE KNOW A SECRET...
   
           --- Shhhhhh! 

                           ... please tell everyone.
                                   (It's the only way we can stop all the hate and bigotry.)

-C.Dashing

[[ 82 ]] Elastic Heart

This video came to my attention this week. Have you seen it?
Some would say it's controversial...   why is that?

What does it represent to you?

To me -- this is a story about Fathers and Daughters... the struggle those relationships often endure. She, fighting to be herself. Fighting him even as he tries to provide a love that she cannot or will not understand.
Then we see her eventual maturing. The slow acceptance as she tests him... only to find that he is a machination of inputs and outputs; for love forces us to play roles.
As the song plays out the two of them eventually find peace, and for a time - harmony.

But when the music ends, she leaves. Adult now, she is able to exist outside the 'cage' of structure and care that he had created to protect her.
He fights to hold her - she fights to pull him through the bars.
Then... he dies.

 ----- A father can never escape the love he has for his daughter.

At least.. that's what I recouped from this.
Maybe you see something different?

Art is opulent like that.    It inspires us to consider the things which are not obvious.  

Hope you enjoyed.
- C.D.

• Click here to learn more about the artist, Sia.

And here are some opinions from others, taken directly from the YouTube comments:

Stream

singsbee.com

22 minutes ago

in Sia's own words, "these two warring 'Sia' self states." The video plays with Shia, representing adulthood and reason, and Maddie, as wild and at times vicious as a child or animal. Maddie plays the subconscious, our imagination, capable of attacking without cause, but also falling asleep in innocence. Shia seems wiser, but he can't control Maddie... and neither can he leave the cage of his own limits. The video makes us question who we like or hate more: reasoning or wild subconscious. And at the end, our dreams are trying to tug us free, but reason just can't get out.

7

singsbee.com

22 minutes ago

The Meaning of the Elastic Heart Video plays upon which one of the two is more savage: the angered innocence of an animal (or a child) or the rage of the angry man. Their skin-tone dirty clothing portrays them at the same level. In the end, it's the man who's unable to escape into innocence, and the child wondering why he can't be free of his chains. While nature can be savage, only man can be as savage as gladiator matches of Rome, or the Hunger Games - the movie this song was originally written for.
My Take:
The meaning of Elastic Heart goes both ways. First, Sia claims you did not break me. On the other hand, she says I trust no one, I may snap, I can't survive. She's fought, she's beaten her ex (another one bites the dust), but she still asks herself, why can I not conquer love. How will she find love again if she makes herself impenetrable? Love means an open heart, not a thick skin and an elastic heart. Like Katniss Everdeen in the movie, fighting for peace doesn't bring peace. Love is being open, not being elastic. Peace isn't beating the other person, it's finding someone to share your heart with.

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smogo

5 hours ago

There's a reason Shia La Beouf is in this video, it's because this video is about him. He's playing himself, not acting

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Sweetie Symone

1 hour ago

He's had a pretty rough life. (I'm obviously not talking about his success in acting, but his family troubles)

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shaunaanne100

1 hour ago

+smogo why would you think that? And how do you know? Curious

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HaiiiWazzuppp

4 hours ago

Guys, this is art. Everyone interprets art differently. Just like poetry. Anyone can think whatever they want.

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Anna Martin

1 hour ago

you're absolutely right!

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Amanda Rodrigues

1 hour ago

i agreeeeeeeeeeee <3 div="">

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Mista Waffle

4 hours ago

Cant tell who was trying to rape who....

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Mary Grace The Friggin Weird

2 hours ago

...neither? 

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Veronica Solana

2 hours ago

*or

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Roberto Casuccio

10 hours ago

The video is so cool, strange like always but cool :D
Sia is one of my favorite artists and inspires me so much!!
I covered some songs on my channell, check it if you want ;)
Thumb up if you liked, i'll really appreciate your support!!

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Adam Perez

4 hours ago

+Zauger cared no one

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kaio r.d.s.

19 minutes ago

Ms. Gui

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Jonét Harry

4 hours ago

I would love to be trapped in a cage with Shia. :3

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Jonét Harry

2 hours ago

+Anon Amoose yeah, so he's legal.

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dan scotfield

33 seconds ago

honey calm your sex!

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ILoveLyricsGirl22

3 hours ago

The video is about how Sia's father suffered from Multiple Personality Disorder and how it affected their relationship and how they lived. This is why you cans see Shia's emotions range and change in an instant. There is nothing pedophilic about this video, instead it's actually really sad because as a child you don't know what is happening. This also explains Maddie's behavior. The cage represents how Shia (Sia's Dad) is trapped in his mind and his personality's while Maddy (Sia) is not.

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sdsdsad

3 hours ago

lmfao no he didn't

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ILoveLyricsGirl22

1 hour ago

+sdsdsad Sia has said herself: Growing up he had two very unique personalities. One was called Phil and one was called Stan… Phil was like the best dad ever… He was fun but he was eloquent and he was present and interesting and interested. When Stan came around stuff got scary,” 

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Kelsey Cochran

7 hours ago (edited)

Okay so obviously my first feeling while watching was pedophilia. But then I thought about the two individuals she picked to portray these animals... I think the cage resembles society as well as the "hollywood industry", we all know and hear about. but we never really know what actually goes on behind close doors. Look at Shia LaBeouf's career - he grew up as a child star, and became this great actor. Has had trouble with the press; and went through that whole "who am I?" phase every person goes through. Except child stars have to grow up in the industry, with all eyes' on them. And I don't know about you all, but there are some sick people in that industry. So maybe that has to do with the pedophilia feel this gives? Now Maddie Ziegler is in the eye of the industry. The ending of the video it shows Maddie can still escape - Shia can't. 

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Kelsey Cochran

8 hours ago (edited)

...but I'm not sure. I like videos like this 'cause they make you think.
Lastly, Sia is amazing. She is a good writer, and what a singer! Artiste!

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Wisti Johnston

6 hours ago

My first thouht was a father and a daughters struggle. dident see any sexual tension. But every one se something diffrent i guess

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Kelsey Cochran

6 hours ago

+Wisti Johnston That is an excellent view! I didn't look at it that way, but I can see that now.

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Chloe Walker

5 hours ago

I so agree 👌👍

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Vanessa Kovacevska

4 hours ago

It's actually about Sia and her relationship with her alcoholic father, as she has claimed.

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Kendal Night

3 hours ago

I like your point of view and I have a bunch of thoughts of what the meaning can be but I love the way this kept me thinking its as if I wanna keep it like that. I love this video and Sia's deep thinking

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George Fajardo

3 hours ago

+Vanessa Kovacevska I honestly see that too. Thanks for pointing it out. Cause I was so lost through out the whole video!

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Candee333

3 hours ago

I love your analogy on it. 

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Zee Sharp

3 hours ago

If you watch Chandlier and then this video I saw it way differently. An innocent child with no food to eat etc. And then this video where there is a cage the girl cant get the father figure out and she's pissed at him but still loves him kind of deal. I didn't see pedophilia...I didn't even know it was Maddie until people brought it up. I still don't see it but to each their own. I freaking love this video.

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Stasi Garraway

2 hours ago

+Vanessa Kovacevska Where has she claimed that? Not on twitter. The statement on her website says "two warring self states of herself"

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Mary Grace The Friggin Weird

2 hours ago

that's a really cool interpretations of this video, i really like it :)

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DULCEBAUTISTA

58 minutes ago

One of the best interpretations ive heard/read. Love it, but now I'm depressed. Lol

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The Anavat

26 minutes ago

+DULCEBAUTISTA I'm scared... XD

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Matt Holmes

2 hours ago (edited)

I'm not gonna lie , the video did give a pedophilia vibe here and there , but I know that's not the point/story , is about the different sides of Sia . The cage is probably a symbol of society , and the struggles with society and Sia's personality . And the flesh colored clothing is sort of a symbol of vulnerability between the two. Like everyone needs to get over themselves, I'm pretty sure Sia doesn't want anyone to be offended, ( but she probably likes the controversy )